I don't know if i am on the right track. Having you around is somehow a bliss, where i can feel comfort and the warmness you've been giving me, but sometimes, the feeling of insecureness bothers when you keep talking about her. I know i should bear in mind that i am nobody to you in the first place. Why are you being nice to me then?

I don't know what i should do now.

All these while i know that nothing lasts forever.

I'm back to my normal busy cum stress mode. Fuck i fucking hate this kind of feeling. School's been hectic ever since last week. Just like Rebecca said, school's something like boarding a bullet train that goes up to 100km/hr. The moment we stepped in school, for sure there will be something to do, and by the nd of the day, you'll be to exhausted and shagged to do al your work. Fuck, like seriously. I don't even know why Singapore is so fucking kiasu in everything. Be it education or the people.

I'll be meeting my two loves tomorroe just to catch up. Sushi on friday with becca they all, and i can't wait. JSXP retreat will be on next tuesday, and i don't know why do they evn need to do it.

On top of that, people around me have been quite annoying and sometimes i'm fucking irritated by them.

I wanna watch Titanic, again.

I fucking hate home now. Fuck ah fuck ah fuck ah. Nabei chao cheebye i fucking hate home.

Now, I am always looking forward to accessing my hotmail and replying to your emails. Because whenever you reply, my heart will jump for joy. I don't know, maybe this is the feeling if having a real penpal crush. HAHAHAHAHA

Change target.

watashi wa たけ　くま　suki desu.
anata wa sugoku kawaii neh !

Buahahahah!

And so, attended MOE's lecture today which was quite stupid. I will blog about that i think perhaps tomorrow. Today's post is actually for someone.

Well here goes.

I've been such a pain in the ass ever since we go to different schools after the O's. It's been six years since i met her. Although we used to fight, reminisce of those ncc days were quite funny sometimes. To be honest, I used to call her backstabber, i used to call her a girl who snatches some people away from me, i used to hate her, seriously. All these while she'll be there when i quarrel with my parents, when sometimes i need someone to talk to, someone to eat with, someone who cracks jokes everytime (i even remember how she made up this "how you look like when you feel like shitting in the train" kinda face).

Well all i can say is, i'm sorry if i've not been there for you, but you will always, forever be my bestfriend. My girl who will be my bridesmaid when i get to step up to another future, and stuffs.

Happy birthday Nur Atikah. :D



Now in my wishlist is to go Japan.

　
わたし　わ　ゆうや　すき　です　！　 ：Ｄ

I guess relationship don't work for me now. I am definitely not ready for it. I still need freedom. I still want to ..... around. I still want to do everything and anytime with whoever i want. But somehow, the feeling of jealousy always struck me whenever i see my friends busy with their boyfriends.

Fuck ah fuck ah fuck ah.